KARACHI: The different experiences of women overlooking the potential of the nikahnama while tying the knot were highlighted during a theatrical exploration of women’s rights organised by the Legal Aid Society (LAS) in collaboration with the United Nations Democratic Endowment Fund (UNDEF), Tehrik-i-Niswan and Bond Advertising at a local hotel here on October 9.
There were interactive booths taking one through the traditional wedding proceedings and celebrations in our country. The performance, which included actual live stories, also opened with wedding celebrations where there was music, singing and dancing but lack of knowledge or hushing up of the rights of the bride.
Then a character named Zubaida Khatoon stood up to inform that she is a mother of a 14-year-old girl about whom she is often told that she is now of marriageable age. “But,” she said, “my daughter is still a child. I have no intention of getting her married unless she completed her education.” Her strong resolve came from her own experience of getting married at the same young age. “The men in my family just decided to have me married off one day. They even told the nikahkhwan that I had said ‘yes’ even though I had not uttered a word and my father also had my age changed to 20 years on my nikahnama,” she informed, adding that her haq mehr was fixed at Rs522.
Another character, Zeenat, said that after doing her Master’s, she was married at the age of 22. “I was educated but I did not know about the clauses that referred to my rights in the nikahnama. My haq mehr was fixed at Rs5,000 even though my dowry cost around 10 lacs,” she said.
There was also the character of Amna, who said that she was a graduate and despite her haq mehr fixed at Rs50,000 and her husband’s promise of presenting her with two tola of gold, as mentioned in her nikahnama, everything was waived later on demand as the husband said that he didn’t have money. “My nikahnama was not honoured and I was also divorced later. When I approached the family court, my husband accused me of all kinds of wrongs,” she said.
The last character was that of Parveen who had a drunkard and drug addict husband. He used to beat her and take all her earnings from her. Then he also remarried. Parveen now tells every mother whose daughter is about to get married to get her to study her nikahnama carefully.
Sheema Kermani of Tehrik-i-Niswan also stressed on how important it is to study and understand the clauses of the nikahnama. “The ministries of human rights and women rights, specially, should promote awareness programmes regarding the rights of women,” she said. Earlier, in her welcome remarks, the CEO of LAS Haya Emaan Zahid said that we are a vibrant society which celebrates the union of a man and woman by their signing on the nikahnama. “But culturally, no one here gives much significance to the legal clauses in the nikahnama while all our focus is on the celebrations,” she said, adding that a girl must start her married life fully informed about her legal rights.
The Sindh Human Rights Commission chairperson spoke about the Child Marriage Restraint Act of 1929, which only Sindh legislated against to change in 2013.
“According to the new Act, the marriageable age for marriage for both boys and girls is 18 whereas it used to be 16 years for girls,” he said. He also spoke about the need for a CNIC column which will be incorporated soon and the importance of registering the nikahkhwans with the local government along with training of new officers of the union councils.
The chief guest on the occasion, Women Development Minister Shaheena Sher Ali, said in her keynote address that there was a need for awareness and for counselling people regarding their rights and responsibilities, especially in the case of the nikahnama and one’s marriage. “A man is never blamed for the dissolution of a marriage, meanwhile the blame is always put on the woman … We need to work towards a policy that no marriage certificates are issued until a nikahnama is fully filled out,” she added.
Published in Dawn, October 10th, 2024
